How HE makes me feel.

You take my hand and you pull me close and hold me tight. It's that sweet love that you give to me, that makes me believe we can make it through anything cause when it all comes down and I'm feeling like I'll never last, I just lean on you, cause you're my better half.

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I often wonder what if..
what if we never met,
what if our cross never passed like it did,
what if we never took the chance,
never took the risk.

I remember always being the girl that didn't necessarily have the fear of commitment.. just didn't want to get to close.. just so I wouldn't be so vulnerable to getting hurt. Would just be too scared and back out when things didn't feel right. I used to think that there was always something wrong with myself. But now I realize, why did I always tear myself down when it was never really my fault that my heart felt the way it did?..

I'm still scared, I'm not going to lie and say that the fear had just magically disappeared. But the main reason why my fear has subsided is the way my boyfriend makes me feel each and ever day I spend with him. He gives me a sense of stability that I've never felt before and that I can act like well.. myself and I don't have to worry about him thinking that I'm so weird. (Cause you know, being normal is totally over-rated xP )

Sometimes I start to think about the beginning and just giggle because it really is amazing how we started out.. I wasn't looking to get serious, but something just happened and it was like wow, why can't I stop thinking about him?! We would talk almost every day and my weekends had mostly consisted of hanging out with him or wanting to hang out with him. And now as I look to see how far we've come I'm just truely happy. The happiest I've ever been with anyone.

I really do cherish every moment we spend together.. I really wouldn't know what to do with myself if he weren't in my life. At this point he really is a huge part of it in every way possible. I guess its true when people say you wouldn't really kow unless you experience it for yourself because I really could sit here, trying to explain it all but it really wouldn't compare to the feeling in itself.

I know I'm totally lame for writing this blog but I just felt like writing a blog out and it just happened to turn out that I felt like writing about him. :)

-Lisa